The Driving Insane

Trying to help an old lady with the computer (while breathing through my mouth because of the stench)

Me: Type your library card number in that box.
Her: That number?
Me: Yes.
Her: That big long number?
Me: Yes.
Her: Right now?
Me: Yes, right now.
[Eventually she gets mostly logged in, then the internet usage agreement screen pops up.]
Me: click "agree".
Her: What am I agreeing to?
Me: That you will not use the internet inappropriately.
Her: Like what?
Me: Like looking at porn.
Her: [agast] No one would do that would they???
Me: Well, we hope not. [yeah, right.]
Her: What does 'use at your own risk' mean? I might see something I don't want to see?
Me: I guess.

She sits there and reads the entire thing while I wait.
After I helped her get on the page she wanted, I decided that would be a good time to take my break.